Blessings

Pregnancy for me is never very easy though I have heard many stories of others who've had it much worse.  Still, I have had increased nausea and vomiting in the last week, regular headaches and fatigue.  I wonder how I'll ever get to some of my tasks.  Then after a rather rough day which included all of the above symptoms, I had a burst of energy.  The problem with this is that it was at 9:00 PM.  What am I going to get done at that time of day???  Actually, I was putting my girls down a little late and had a good amount of fun with them at bedtime.   Lately with all my symptoms, bedtime has been yet another task and it makes me sad that life is like that right now most of the time.  I decided I would simply enjoy feeling good once I said my goodnights and gave kisses, noses and hugs all around.  When I have had other energy bursts, I have gone for walks or really got a lot done around here.  It feels good. I thank God for those times of reprieve.  Ever since my first pregnancy I have said that I wish I could just hibernate for nine months - I'm halfway serious about this though I know that I really don't want this since I have children to raise.  I'm thankful that these symptoms lift when the babies are born.  The next day after giving birth, I feel "back to myself."  I almost forget what it feels like to be "me" during all those months.  It is actually easier for me once the babies are born. :)

Since my post last week, tensions have been lighter around here.  God is good like that not to allow things to be burdensome for too long.  I had to think why there was a change and it was actually - no surprise here - communication.  Naturally, an opportunity to parent arose that brought this out between me and AJ and then my husband, JR became involved.  Communication is key to easing tensions.  I have to remember this.  I don't mean nagging either - that's different.  I need to remember to not only pray in the midst of difficult situations which I was doing, but also pray for the divine opportunity for communication and healing. We'll see how the weekend goes.  :)

This week, I have been occupied with watching the Republican National Convention.  I continue to have hopes that our current president will be out of job after this election.  I also continue to have some reservations about Romney but I hope in him and continue to pray for God's mercy on our country.  I had to remind myself that as much as I watch politics, I need to be praying continuously.  At Bible Study, my mom pointed out that Billy Graham is calling the faithful of this country to fast for 40 days up to the election.  This would begin something like September 27th.  Though I am not in a position to fast, I am willing to give up something(s) and to make prayer commitments.  Perhaps others will join in this.  Fasting is a powerful means for the Lord to work and we cannot underestimate it.  It can be easy to forget in the culture we live which only reminds us from every angle of each and every last way of how to gratify ourselves. 

Transitions

Since my last post too many weeks ago now, I have become pregnant for the 7th time.  Currently I am 16 weeks and have felt the usual fatigue and nausea though it is starting to abate now that I'm into my second trimester.  We are praying for a healthy baby and with all the girls we have together, it will be interesting to see what gender the baby is at my next appointment.  I have had to get used to being pregnant more so than with any of the others though I knew we would likely have another, it happened a touch sooner than I was prepared for.  I had hoped to find greater success with weight loss to have a better time with the pregnancy and possibly avoid gestational diabetes this time.  But I only made a dent and now have had to let it go for the most part though I am being more disciplined about my diet and testing my blood.  My husband, JR had been more than ready for me to become pregnant again and in all actuality this baby and HC will be the largest spread we have had with our children with 2.5 years apart.  HC just turned 2 and she is turning into a little kid though still so sweet and good natured.  I am savoring this pregnancy in case it's my last.  I will be forty about the time the baby comes.  It would be nice to move forward and focus on the children I have but I know another baby is possible since we will not get in the way of God.  I do plan to use the Fertility Monitor and charting (FAM) to avoid pregnancy.  I have two close college friends (both also from Franciscan University) who are also pregnant right now - each with their 9th pregnancy though each also suffered a miscarriage.  I have other peers who are having babies still and so I feel I have others around me who are in my situation having children into their late 30s and even early 40s.  

Besides this, I am also committed to homeschooling my full-time stepson, AJ who is 15 and entering 10th grade.  I never thought I would homeschool him.  I say this because he is the only one in our family in his age group, he is very social, he can be negative with his sisters (can be normal for his age) and because of our dynamic issue.  This last one is complicated but obviously the Lord has been doing great work.  AJ has been asking to be homeschooled and I see that the local school is not challenging him.  He got all As and Bs last term and he never had homework and he has learning challenges!  I first thought I might slide into public schooling at home but in looking at the wealth of curriculum choices out there, I became inspired to go my own way and will be doing the traditional homeschooling.  He has been working for grandpa at his business in town which offers him skilled training.  He'll be busy with that.  Our town is small enough too that he easily hooks up with his buddies.  I pray for the Lord's help in this for both of us and for his Grace.  

Having a teenager in our home mixed with little kids holds it's own challenges.  It is nice for quick babysitting needs and some help with household things.  But he is up later and I feel like my evening time is not my own anymore.  Also this age for him holds many lessons and takes much time and energy.  When he comes home from work or there's something with a friend and he shares about it, it seems there is always some kind of lesson in response which can include offering a shift in perspective.  We're fortunate AJ is so communicative.  He likes to be around the family rather than holing up in his room like most kids his age.  But again he requires his own care - though different from the little ones but still care.

In reading Consoling the Heart of Jesus I have tried to embrace humility and service.  I am working at letting go for peace within my heart and entrusting my cares and family to the Lord.  I know He can take care of any needs.  

I know I'm jumping around here a bit, but I continue to follow politics and hope and pray for God's mercy on our country.  I pray that truth can reign and we can have a new administration for the next term.  Honestly though, I have reservations about Romney but I have hope that they will not hold water if he's elected.  I do not want to see the current administration have four more years to continue to increase the deficit at such an alarming rate and take powers that is not theirs to make unilateral executive decisions.  I hold onto hope.  True hope - not the false hope promised four years ago.