Joyous Advent

As we come into the 3rd week of Advent, we still don't have any Christmas decorations up - well, except for lights up on our house outside.  I'm okay with this because I know we technically aren't in the Christmas season yet.  However, tomorrow will be the day we get our tree and deck the halls and I think that's okay too.  The decorations and festivities help build anticipation for the Season.  I try not to be too overwhelmed with the extra things that the Holiday time brings.  But I am finding myself overwhelmed with life in general.  I feel like I am always "doing" though praise God I am praying because without it I know life would be harder.  It is no coincidence that when I spend time in prayer, I am better able to take the high road more often in my approach to the things that come up in my day plus I have to have my time with The Lord.  I hunger for it because I can know Him more each time we spend time together.  This Advent I have given up wine or any drink (with the exception of my husband's work party.)  For me it's important to try to implement ways to fast or obstain in smaller and bigger ways as I feel led but especially at these times of the year.  

In a previous post I mentioned that I would share more about my journey of learning more about family planning - well in specific In Vitro Fertilization or IVF.  I guess you could say, I always knew within myself that it was wrong.  When I worried about my own fertility after my two losses, I knew that I could never (hopefully never) consider IVF but I would maybe consider IUI - which injects the sperm into the uterus so conception still happens in the womb BUT not with the sexual act.  This would have been considered after trying fertility drugs and only if we were desperate even though I knew it was against the Church.  Thankfully, we never had to face the choice especially since my own faith walk was so shaky during that time and I was indeed desperate for child.  Now, I am very compassionate and understanding of the deep need to be a parent especially after losing a baby.  But after what I have discovered about IVF and investigating the Church's position on it, I cannot believe that the need for a baby justifies the disrespect for human life which is unavoidable with IVF.    

How did my awareness of this come about?  I do volunteer work with and am on the Board of Directors for a national non-profit in support of those facing pregnancy or infant loss, infertility or adoption challenges.  These issues can be all linked for some couples.  A few months ago, the director of the organization wanted me to contact the local parish when they refused to list their resource in their bulletin because they claimed the organization supported IVF and she believed the organization did not support it.  When examining closer, it came clear to me that I could not defend her position because on the organization's website there were IVF links listed there to obtain more information and such.  I came under sudden conviction and began my research.  I approached the director who is Christian and a friend of mine.  I worried my position would cause a rift.  Instead, she was very open and told me she'd so some of her own research and pray about it.  I also was praying about it and for her.  She came to the same conclusion as I did that the links needed to be removed together with any other links that strongly supported IVF directly themselves.  Additionally, the organization would not offer any information or referrals of any kind to couples about IVF and instead be given materials about why not to choose IVF (this last thing still has yet to happen.)  But I Praise God for how things have turned around!  

At the same time I was reading the Catholic novel, Motherless by Brian J. Gail which is the second book in a trilogy.  This book in part exposes and educates about the evil of Artificial Reproductive Technology or (ART.)  My eyes were opening all around.  So what was I seeing that I wasn't before?  That in the desperation to have a child, couples not only separate the sexual act from the procreative one and often with self-stimulation on the part of the male to produce sperm but that in the process many more embryos are created than ever live or can be used.  While these embryos are "waiting," they are frozen and when the time comes to be used, they are thawed and many do not live but die.  Of the ones that live, couples then have to choose which embryos show the most promise to attempt to inject into the mother's womb or the womb of another.  The ones not chosen are "discarded."  Then in the process of attempting implantation many do not take and die.  Then if too many implant, often times couples are faced with "reduction" which is choosing which ones will be aborted or killed.  So in other words, in the want of having a child many other children die.  Oh, and the babies left in waiting in the freezers could be waiting indefinitely or in some cases adopted by others.  The church teaches that having children is a gift from God and the sanctity of life should not be compromised in our desire to "have" a child.  Our society is focused so much on the having!  Having a child is so much more -- it is the BEING A PARENT!  Each and every baby conceived is a child and in the case of IVF it is a tragedy that these children are being treated so recklessly by their parents!  Again, I want to emphasize my compassion towards those wanting a child from their bodies.  I have touched personally on this deep need after my own losses and questions about my own fertility!  But now I can no longer shut my eyes to the horror of IVF.  It is a great deception of our time that this is even happening!  Additionally, many women and men are not aware that modern birth control often aborts embryos (meaning fertilized eggs) by preventing implantation.  It can also cause a host of problems for women including increased risk for fertility issues and cervical cancer.  If people are aware, they overlook it as acceptable risk flushing fertilized eggs and acceptable risk of increased health problems.  I sincerely wish there was more advocacy to raise awareness about the moral problems of ART and birth control even within our current pro-life groups.  I am consoled to find that real alternatives to IVF are available out there to help those facing fertility struggles with NaPRO technology available through either the Pope Paul VI Institute or FertilityCare Clinics.  I praise God that He opened my eyes to these truths and gave me deep conviction.  I hunger for His truth and have come to know in a concrete way in my life that the Truth will set us free.  I am free to live in His Light and His revelations are exciting to me.  I don't want to live in confusion or deception.  I want also for others to know the Truth of Christ which brings freedom.  I don't want to keep it for myself but want the lives of others to be transformed through the love of Jesus.  I can only do my part through prayer, through living in Grace, sharing His love in the way I relate to others and sometimes sharing through direct words or conversation.  I pray for an outpouring of The Lord's Grace this Advent and upcoming Christmas season.